The Agreement Frame is a strategy to redirect a person’s argumentative energy rather than attempting to overcome it. The Agreement Frame one of the best methods to reduce resistance when communicating with people, especially during negotiations.
The agreement frame takes one or more of the following form combinations:
- I respect……..also……..
- I appreciate……..and……..
- I agree……..also……..and……..
Refrain from using “I understand” in the Agreement Frame. Each person understands from different perspectives and experiences that are unique to each other. Someone can argue that you do not understand, yet they can’t easily argue that you do not respect, appreciate or agree.
Common language patterns utilizing the Agreement Frame include statements such as;
- “I agree, (restate)… and this means …”
- “I agree, (restate)…, and what’s more, we should …”
- “I respect where you’re coming from, and what we need to look at now is…”
- “I appreciate what you’re saying right now, and our objective now should be to look at…”
- “I agree that from your point of view this is accurate, so what we might want to concentrate on then is…”
When using the Agreement Frame avoid using words such as “but”, “yet” or “however” that negate what the person just said. They will negate everything that was said immediately preceding it and prevent the moving into an agreement frame. Instead use “and” or “also” that will bring the two statements together.
Avoiding resistance from others keeps everyone involved in what is being said while leaving them open to new ideas. The Agreement Frame this is very useful in conflict resolution of all kinds as well as Sales and Negotiation.
By saying you agree, you keep others on your side and open to the conversation while you move toward the point you wish to make with less resistance.